
Loneliness
Loneliness has to be
experienced to be understood and it is by no means peculiar to those who
live alone. It is possible to be very lonely indeed amidst a crowd of
people. It is also one of the trials that many of us have to face at
some time in our lives.
A sympathetic ear devoid
of impatience; a little understanding of the problems of loneliness; an
act of kindness and love—all warm the heart of the lonely one. These
things help to make life easier, but the problem of being lonely
remains.
The loneliness of Jesus
Christ
Jesus must have
experienced loneliness on many occasions. He knew the warmth of family
life, but preparation for his ministry and service to his Father had to
come first in his life. This dedication to his Father offended his
family at times and drew him apart from them. This is evident when his
mother and brethren waited without, hoping to see him, but Jesus,
indicating his disciples, said, "Behold my mother and my brethren". In
spite also of the closeness to him of his constant companions, the
disciples, they were far from understanding fully his purpose and
sacrifice.
During the last few days
of his life, Jesus' loneliness increased. When he needed them most, his
friends left him. At the last supper his disciples contended as to who
should be accounted the greatest, and Judas departed to betray him.
Fearful of what should become of them, the disciples fled when Jesus was
taken by the soldiers, thus fulfilling the Master's prophecy that they
would be scattered as sheep without a shepherd. The final ordeal of the
cross was before Jesus.
So with all this
loneliness how did Jesus cope?
Jesus gained strength
throughout his ministry by his quiet communion with God. We cannot
achieve the closeness of Jesus to God, but we can turn often to God in
prayer, gaining strength in time of need.
When
Jesus heard what had happened, he withdrew by boat privately to a
solitary place. Hearing of this, the crowds followed him on foot from
the towns.
Matthew Ch.14:13
Presence of Jesus
Of all human
experiences, one of the most poignant is that of being separated from
those we hold dear. To take leave of one we love is to experience an
acute sense of loss—a feeling of sadness and of loneliness—the intensity
of which varies with the strength of our regard for the one who is going
away.
What then, we may ask,
must have been the feelings of the disciples of Jesus when, after he had
led them as far as to Bethany, their Lord blessed them and was parted
from them and carried up into heaven? Surely, their sense of loss must
have been more intense than anything we have experienced.
If we have ever reasoned
along these lines, we shall be surprised to discover that in point of
fact the disciples' feelings on this memorable occasion were quite
otherwise. The Gospel records of the Ascension betray no sense of loss.
On the contrary, to quote from Luke's account, when they had witnessed
the Ascension of their Lord the disciples
"returned to Jerusalem with great joy: and were continually in the
temple, praising and blessing God." How is this remarkable
paradox to be explained ? How is it that whereas we are downcast and sad
when we have taken leave of a loved one, the eleven, in apparently
similar circumstances, were able to rejoice? There is only one possible
explanation: the disciples did not believe that in any real sense they
had been separated from their Lord. They were, in fact, filled with an
overwhelming sense of his presence. Jesus was gradually training them to
understand that he was present everywhere.
Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptising them in the
name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching
them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you
always, to the very end of the age."
Matthew Ch.28:19-20
For
where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them."
Matthew Ch.18:20
Presence of God
Loneliness does not
necessarily mean absence of other persons, it is more likely to be lack
of affinity of mind. Satisfaction of heart is not experienced in a
crowd, but in the consciousness of someone who is one with us in thought
and aspiration. Though mankind are bound closer together than ever by
the inventions that enter every home and land simultaneously, yet
loneliness of heart is just as possible as before.
Companionship is more
real in the realm of the spirit than that of the senses. It is the
spiritual presence or companionship of the Divine that gives radiance to
a man's countenance, stedfastness to his faith, and love and joy to his
heart. It was the blessing offered to the Children of Israel that
shepherded them through the wilderness when they had left Egypt for the
Promised hand. Moses said, "Show me Thy way
that I may know Thee,” and the reply came: "My presence shall go with
thee and I will give thee rest."
The modern Children of
the Covenant are assured of a triumphant end to their pilgrimage in the
same promise echoed ages after, through the words of the Good Shepherd :
"If a
man love me, he will keep my words and my Father will love him and we
will come unto him and make our abode with him. For such a man—all
things abound !”
God is present
everywhere so there is no need to feel lonely.
Even
though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no
evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
Psalm 23:4
Yet I
am always with you; you hold me by my right hand. You guide me with your
counsel, and afterward you will take me into glory. Whom have I in
heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you. My flesh and
my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion
forever. But as for me, it is good to be near God.
I have
made the Sovereign LORD my refuge; I will tell of all your deeds.
Psalm 73:23-26, 28
Keep
your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you
have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I
forsake you."
Hebrews Ch.13:5
Overcoming loneliness
We all need human
relationships.
The
LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a
helper suitable for him."
Genesis Ch.2:18
Complete isolation is
not beneficial; men and women need companionship so that we can show
love, consideration, sympathy, responsibility and mutual understanding.
These are qualities which God has and is looking for us to have as well.
Some people who wanted
to stop being lonely did the following:
They
devoted themselves to the apostles' teaching and to the fellowship, to
the breaking of bread and to prayer.
Acts Ch.2:42
Another way to
overcoming loneliness is to care for the lonely.
Dear friend, you are doing a good work for God in taking care of the
traveling teachers and missionaries who are passing through
3 John Ch.1:5
[1]
In the early days of the
first century there were traveling prophets and teachers who were helped
on their way by various people who housed and fed them. Hospitality is a
way of showing love to others. Because of our individualistic, self-centred
society, there are many people who wonder if anyone cares whether they
live or die. If you find such a lonely person, show him or her that you
care!
Overcoming loneliness –
turning to God
Jesus gained strength
throughout his ministry by his quiet communion with God. We cannot
achieve the closeness of Jesus to God, but we can turn often to God in
prayer, gaining strength in time of need.
We may feel lonely, but
we are never alone. Because of the sacrifice of Jesus we can approach
God through Jesus Christ who knows all our weaknesses and can feel and
understand for us. It is only because of the sympathy and understanding
of our Lord who himself knew sorrow, grief, pain—and loneliness—that we
can approach boldly "the throne of our gracious
God, where we may receive mercy, and in His grace find timely help"
Hebrews 4:16 N.E.B.
Praying to God in times
of loneliness can help relieve the feelings of isolation.
My
eyes are ever on the LORD, for only he will release my feet from the
snare. Turn to me and be gracious to me, for I am lonely and afflicted.
Psalm
25:15-16
The writer of this psalm
(King David) was surrounded by his personal guard and his closest
advisers and supportive friends, yet he still felt alone. He felt alone
because he had been betrayed. We may be rejected by our family or
betrayed by a close friend and this can make us feel very much alone and
isolated. Praying to God can be the answer.
Do not
be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition,
with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God,
which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your
minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians Ch.4:6-7
Solitude
Sometime being alone can
be a good thing.
Solitude is a being at a
remote place where there are no other people. It is a lonely,
unfrequented place for example in the mountains.
Solitude is important
for prayer and refreshment.
At
daybreak Jesus went out to a solitary place. The people were looking for
him and when they came to where he was, they tried to keep him from
leaving them.
Luke Ch.4:42
Jesus had to get up very
early just to get some time alone. If Jesus needed solitude for prayer
and refreshment, how much more is this true for us? Don’t become so busy
that life turns non stop activity leaving no room for quiet time alone
with God. No matter how much you have to do, you should always have time
for prayer.
Develop the discipline
of spending time alone with God – it will help you grow spiritually and
become more and more like Christ.

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